Attachment Styles in Grief and Loss

Name: Attachment Styles in Grief and Loss
Uploaded: 2025-11-09T00:06:34.000Z
Description: Roger Solomon shares how attachment styles shape grief responses and how EMDR can ease traumatic loss.

Roger Solomon shares how attachment styles shape grief responses and how EMDR can ease traumatic loss.

From the course

EMDR for Complicated Grief

When there is a loss, a person's gonna experience distress. This can activate the attachment system and the need for safety, but now the person they look to for safety or comfort is gone. This can activate early childhood memories pertaining to how separation distress was dealt with. What the clinician is gonna be looking for is how scared or anxious the person is without the loved one. People with an anxious attachment may be ruminating, more insecure, lonely. They're gonna be more scared of what life will be like without this person. People with an avoidant attachment style may shut down, be numb, and feel flooded when emotions are being evolved. The avoidant person may withdraw from other people because talking with other people starts to stimulate memories of their loved one, and that can be too much. So there can be increased social isolation and staying away from reminders. The person with a disorganized attachment style can really be triggered experiencing more severe symptoms of anxiety and shutdown. For the secure person, it can be said that time heals all wounds. Yes. There's distress. Yes. There's upset, but the person with the secure attachment is able to cope with it, reach out for help, receive help, and deal with the distress that comes with loss over time. With more complicated grief, there's the loss, the trauma of the loss, but it's being fed by feeder memories stemming from caregiver child interactions. Very distressing, very devastating, and EMR therapy can help a person deal with the traumatic aspects of the loss.